11.15.18
To say this was JUST a sensual awakening would be, only partly true. Only through being placed in such unique situations, have I truly been able to open up as a woman. I also would never forget the people, I've met who have shaped me to being a better version of myself. The biggest difference, you will notice from THEN and NOW, is that I am not afraid of myself anymore. I truly love the person I am now, and the person I keep pushing to be. I'm simply enthusiastic to share with you, my desires! The likes, dislikes, the crazy, and the simple. Summed up you could say it is a bucket list with boundaries.
To say this was JUST a sensual awakening would be, only partly true. Only through being placed in such unique situations, have I truly been able to open up as a woman. I also would never forget the people, I've met who have shaped me to being a better version of myself. The biggest difference, you will notice from THEN and NOW, is that I am not afraid of myself anymore. I truly love the person I am now, and the person I keep pushing to be. I'm simply enthusiastic to share with you, my desires! The likes, dislikes, the crazy, and the simple. Summed up you could say it is a bucket list with boundaries.
Before you are thinking 'BOUNDARIES I thought you where EXPLORING your sexy self.' I am going to say to you, WAIT, and read a little further. Boundaries are sexy, because trust and honesty are key's to living openly. With those in place it makes learning new things, enjoyable, and you can get the best out of your journey. That's my perspective.
Starting Off my likes! Things I have either tried and loved, or things I just have a real interest in.
Oral: I love giving Head, deep throating I have been practicing and I do enjoy it. Being eaten out I also enjoy, as foreplay, I do need more than that to get off, and also I wouldn't say its my "GO TO" foreplay move either, If you are not going to be "hungry" about eating me out. Don't bother.
DDLG: I do know I enjoy being a part-time little, I love the relaxed nature of it. I am not into the diaper wearing or being talked to like a baby or in a child voice. That just feels meh, I don't like it. I do however, love being dressed up or down. I like being given direction and I would love to have my own binky one day. I'm hoping with my next place of living I'll be able to create a little space to have. Plus, having a daddy is really really nice.
Pet Play: I haven't gotten to try this yet fully, but I love wearing my butt plugs that have tails more then the normal ones. I want to explore this more, get a leash and be walked around have ears and a nice tail. I've always wanted a sexy tail and ears and leash. Drink milk out of a bowl and be petted and walked around on all fours. As for the animal, I think a cat I don't really wanna play a dog. I am not that excited to follow orders more just to, be loved on.
Bondage: I've only done very light bondage, but I honestly loved it. I want more rope so I can practice doing even more bondage and I really want to be suspended in bondage and have photo's taken of me. I want to be in a summer dress though for my first time. Not naked, its my first time so I want it to be more fun then sexual you know. I feel a lot of people push everything kinky to full sex, but there are levels to almost everything, as much as it may seem I'm a jump person. I am not, I like to dip my toe in and test things out, then I dive.
Masturbation: I enjoy touching myself, and I do actually love making video's and such. It makes me feel really confident and sexy. I have always wanted to watch someone get off in front of me, I think I'm a low-key closet perv. I enjoy watching other people a lot. I don't wanna always join because watching for me, is really sexy as well. I don't know how I would feel just yet with watching someone watch me, do that. I still get embarrassed if I am caught touching myself (which I've yet to be caught, but the almost's scare me)
Couples: I will admit, I am a unicorn looking for a couple to vibe out with me. I would love to see where couples take me especially since I love watching ,and I FEEL like I would love to be watched (by the guy) if that's what they would be into. I'm not sure though. I've only been with one couple and we where already friends and etc etc... It was actually what opened my eyes to the fun and playful side of dating couples. I will say, I'm actively looking, and something I run into a lot is only one person out of the couple talking to you, but claiming its a joined thing. I feel if it is joined, the getting to know me should be going through with both since all three people would be involved. I don't mind going out with other people who are in open relationships, I just always ask " Does your partner know your in an open relationship" Some get offended with me asking, others understand I'm just wanting to know what's up. Even though I love following pleasures, I don't enjoy hurting anyone. It takes the beauty of being open right out. That is also not "open" that is just douchey. A really nifty trend is that a couple will text me through group chat! They will send me pictures of them and their lives and I will admit I LOVE THAT!
Erotic Photography: I love love love taking photo's and videos in a sensual manner. I have all these things I want to try, for photo shoots!! It's more of like a hobby thing though. I want to get more into taking photo's of other people! Most think that when I say sensual it means sexual but they are different things. I want to do erotic in the ARTIST lighting. Not in the porn lighting, which is what a lot of photographers slide into my DM's are looking for. I'm looking for another artist who wants to create something with me!
For a year, I would take photo's (only for me) all different angles and lightening, with just my phone. Phone camera's are AMAZING! After awhile, I would send them to my closer female friends. Then a few of the girls really helped me to embrace my body. Because of that, I started taking photo's of my close female friends, in erotic poses and clothing, and after we would talk about all the things they loved, and just really encourage self love and growth for them. I love boosting up women to love their BODIES RIGHT NOW! Not when it's fit! NOW, and if you are placing enough self-love into yourself, you will begin to MAKE healthier choices. Well again, thats just my belief.
Anal: At first this def. was not even a real thought. I just placed it on my bucket list without much thought. As I've gotten older, I've had some laughable moments in regards to anal, but I do enjoy wearing a plug. It has felt good once during actual anal sex, and I would love to see if I could actually orgasm from it. I LOVE when my plug is in while I'm having sex, or masturbating. Masturbation is actually how I tell a lot of girls to introduce themselves to the idea of anal. I want to try anal beads they seem really scary, I want to see if I can push myself that far. I have never had my ass eaten though, I will say that is also on my bucket list. Though my whole butt area I can get pretty shy with. Lets just also add a vibrating plug. I recently learned those are a thing!
I feel Anal sex can and is also pleasure for women, I do not ever advice watching porn to learn about blow jobs & anal. Those women KNOW about their bodies and limitations and its also their JOB, so ladies AND MEN!!!!, please take that nasty stigma of THAT being anal out of your mind. Unless you are already fully into that, please don't mind me, and continue to your own pleasures! Side note: Men ask before you assume, always use fucking lube, AFTER CARE always. I'm deff. doing a blog on booty-stuff later for sure.
Toys: I've only used a Dildo, once and if you read "Did I Diddle my Dildo" then you know my thoughts. It hasn't stopped my curiosity for trying new toys and things! I do want to try a wand, or vibrating panties. You will be surprised to know, I've never been handcuffed (sexually, I should state). Only been blind folded once. So there is still much to explore here. Some toys that have caught my attention are that I haven't already mentioned would be: Full use of a spreader bar, sex swing (wtf is that how does it work), different type of paddles, handcuffs, wax (used once for fun but not play), Feel of different type of rope on my skin, vibrator, gag, jade eggs... I'm sure I can think of more later.
Sexy Clothes: I've found I love putting on sexy outfits and smoking, I like wearing heels while I clean, but I only own one pair so hold off on doing that often. I like wearing my lingerie outfits while I do yoga. Feels empowering for me. I think more people should do yoga nude or in little clothing. It's as if I'm tapping into my sensual goddess, as I'm stretching and giving my body some serious self love. I can focus on how the lace will slide over my skin, or I can focus on my own breathing which can be pretty attractive also. At first it will be rather weird, but I promise after a while, you kinda just .... fall into it.
Events: This is something, I have been attempting to be a bit more active with, but events cost money, and I don't want to go alone. Yet going with total strangers also doesn't feel like I would relax enough to be open to anything that COULD or MAY happen. I will keep placing out positive mental vibes!!! I was thinking if I met a nice couple, I could go with them since I would already be in the mindset of exploration.
Body Worship: Oh man, I've seen some extreme body worship and I am barely allowing myself to take in compliments. The very idea of being worshiped when I see myself as such a flawed person is crazy! Only within the past year, have a started to allow being praised and my body being admired and touched and rubbed and just loved on in general. Body worship is a perfect balance of sensual and sexual and its so easy to switch between the two. Since I am also one, who enjoys worshiping the bodies of those I involved romantically with.
Hard Limits
Which I now know means things, I will not even give a try to because they cross a line with me. Doing these things to me would be a sign that you don't respect me or the lines I've placed forth.
Rape Play: I think this is very hard no, I don't want to Pretend I don't want it. Sex for me comes from a loving manner, even if it is just a fantasy, for me I would never want it done to me.
Hard Hitting: I do not like being smacked around, it flags anger and memories I don't like. Like if your hitting me to bruise me, I will turn around and fucking punch you in the fucking mouth. It's a privileged in my eyes to touch me. Now if sexy rough sex leads to accidental bruising well that's not on purpose hitting. Those are just markings of a good time. There are levels man. Learn yours.
Face Slapping: That is an instant turn-off and I will slap you right back harder.
Breathe Play: I do not like having my breathe taken away from me, I feel weak and scared. Since I can't breathe I feel I have lost my voice, which I worked very hard to find my voice.
Degrading & Humiliation: I tried to find a Mistress for the longest time, finally I found one on Fetlife, she was in Paris and we would Skype a few times a week, and she was really into having her name marked on people, nipple torture and also very into humiliation. Her first request from me was, to lick the toilet, send her a photo. I cleaned my toilet SPOTLESS, but .... I couldn't do it. I told her, and she said lick the floor then, again I cleaned the floor, I couldn't do it. No fucking way. Then I decided to look more into humiliation and degrading. . . IT IS NOT FOR ME.
Do not EVER speak to my with Disrespect call me names, claim me, or order me to think less of myself. I already struggle with embracing sensuality in a over sexual world, where most people can't tell the difference between the two, and still treat women of over confidence with hatred. Sorry, I went off on a rant.
FISTING: Haha, no.
I didn't want to go into to much detail for these topics, each one does have a story, or something that emotional triggered me. Now you know, and I feel creating a hard list even if it only has one thing is amazing, for you to know and for whomever you are deciding to let into your life.
There is a lot I'm sure I didn't even get to cover, but this is my basic's from THEN to NOW. I hope you enjoyed reading this, maybe you want to write you own! If you do please email it to me, I love talking to people about their desires.
I want to make it clear, YES I am open in sharing my experiences, YES I enjoy sharing and creating and this is my hobby. This does NOT mean, I am looking for people to help fill these goals, this is not an ad to find a Dom or a Sub, etc etc, if you email just have some common sense and respect. Which I know my readers have, but it is the inter-webs and you just gotta make shit clear.
xo
naturesmuse
Erotic Photography: I love love love taking photo's and videos in a sensual manner. I have all these things I want to try, for photo shoots!! It's more of like a hobby thing though. I want to get more into taking photo's of other people! Most think that when I say sensual it means sexual but they are different things. I want to do erotic in the ARTIST lighting. Not in the porn lighting, which is what a lot of photographers slide into my DM's are looking for. I'm looking for another artist who wants to create something with me!
For a year, I would take photo's (only for me) all different angles and lightening, with just my phone. Phone camera's are AMAZING! After awhile, I would send them to my closer female friends. Then a few of the girls really helped me to embrace my body. Because of that, I started taking photo's of my close female friends, in erotic poses and clothing, and after we would talk about all the things they loved, and just really encourage self love and growth for them. I love boosting up women to love their BODIES RIGHT NOW! Not when it's fit! NOW, and if you are placing enough self-love into yourself, you will begin to MAKE healthier choices. Well again, thats just my belief.
Anal: At first this def. was not even a real thought. I just placed it on my bucket list without much thought. As I've gotten older, I've had some laughable moments in regards to anal, but I do enjoy wearing a plug. It has felt good once during actual anal sex, and I would love to see if I could actually orgasm from it. I LOVE when my plug is in while I'm having sex, or masturbating. Masturbation is actually how I tell a lot of girls to introduce themselves to the idea of anal. I want to try anal beads they seem really scary, I want to see if I can push myself that far. I have never had my ass eaten though, I will say that is also on my bucket list. Though my whole butt area I can get pretty shy with. Lets just also add a vibrating plug. I recently learned those are a thing!
I feel Anal sex can and is also pleasure for women, I do not ever advice watching porn to learn about blow jobs & anal. Those women KNOW about their bodies and limitations and its also their JOB, so ladies AND MEN!!!!, please take that nasty stigma of THAT being anal out of your mind. Unless you are already fully into that, please don't mind me, and continue to your own pleasures! Side note: Men ask before you assume, always use fucking lube, AFTER CARE always. I'm deff. doing a blog on booty-stuff later for sure.
Toys: I've only used a Dildo, once and if you read "Did I Diddle my Dildo" then you know my thoughts. It hasn't stopped my curiosity for trying new toys and things! I do want to try a wand, or vibrating panties. You will be surprised to know, I've never been handcuffed (sexually, I should state). Only been blind folded once. So there is still much to explore here. Some toys that have caught my attention are that I haven't already mentioned would be: Full use of a spreader bar, sex swing (wtf is that how does it work), different type of paddles, handcuffs, wax (used once for fun but not play), Feel of different type of rope on my skin, vibrator, gag, jade eggs... I'm sure I can think of more later.
Sexy Clothes: I've found I love putting on sexy outfits and smoking, I like wearing heels while I clean, but I only own one pair so hold off on doing that often. I like wearing my lingerie outfits while I do yoga. Feels empowering for me. I think more people should do yoga nude or in little clothing. It's as if I'm tapping into my sensual goddess, as I'm stretching and giving my body some serious self love. I can focus on how the lace will slide over my skin, or I can focus on my own breathing which can be pretty attractive also. At first it will be rather weird, but I promise after a while, you kinda just .... fall into it.
Events: This is something, I have been attempting to be a bit more active with, but events cost money, and I don't want to go alone. Yet going with total strangers also doesn't feel like I would relax enough to be open to anything that COULD or MAY happen. I will keep placing out positive mental vibes!!! I was thinking if I met a nice couple, I could go with them since I would already be in the mindset of exploration.
Body Worship: Oh man, I've seen some extreme body worship and I am barely allowing myself to take in compliments. The very idea of being worshiped when I see myself as such a flawed person is crazy! Only within the past year, have a started to allow being praised and my body being admired and touched and rubbed and just loved on in general. Body worship is a perfect balance of sensual and sexual and its so easy to switch between the two. Since I am also one, who enjoys worshiping the bodies of those I involved romantically with.
Hard Limits
Which I now know means things, I will not even give a try to because they cross a line with me. Doing these things to me would be a sign that you don't respect me or the lines I've placed forth.
Rape Play: I think this is very hard no, I don't want to Pretend I don't want it. Sex for me comes from a loving manner, even if it is just a fantasy, for me I would never want it done to me.
Hard Hitting: I do not like being smacked around, it flags anger and memories I don't like. Like if your hitting me to bruise me, I will turn around and fucking punch you in the fucking mouth. It's a privileged in my eyes to touch me. Now if sexy rough sex leads to accidental bruising well that's not on purpose hitting. Those are just markings of a good time. There are levels man. Learn yours.
Face Slapping: That is an instant turn-off and I will slap you right back harder.
Breathe Play: I do not like having my breathe taken away from me, I feel weak and scared. Since I can't breathe I feel I have lost my voice, which I worked very hard to find my voice.
Degrading & Humiliation: I tried to find a Mistress for the longest time, finally I found one on Fetlife, she was in Paris and we would Skype a few times a week, and she was really into having her name marked on people, nipple torture and also very into humiliation. Her first request from me was, to lick the toilet, send her a photo. I cleaned my toilet SPOTLESS, but .... I couldn't do it. I told her, and she said lick the floor then, again I cleaned the floor, I couldn't do it. No fucking way. Then I decided to look more into humiliation and degrading. . . IT IS NOT FOR ME.
Do not EVER speak to my with Disrespect call me names, claim me, or order me to think less of myself. I already struggle with embracing sensuality in a over sexual world, where most people can't tell the difference between the two, and still treat women of over confidence with hatred. Sorry, I went off on a rant.
FISTING: Haha, no.
I didn't want to go into to much detail for these topics, each one does have a story, or something that emotional triggered me. Now you know, and I feel creating a hard list even if it only has one thing is amazing, for you to know and for whomever you are deciding to let into your life.
There is a lot I'm sure I didn't even get to cover, but this is my basic's from THEN to NOW. I hope you enjoyed reading this, maybe you want to write you own! If you do please email it to me, I love talking to people about their desires.
I want to make it clear, YES I am open in sharing my experiences, YES I enjoy sharing and creating and this is my hobby. This does NOT mean, I am looking for people to help fill these goals, this is not an ad to find a Dom or a Sub, etc etc, if you email just have some common sense and respect. Which I know my readers have, but it is the inter-webs and you just gotta make shit clear.
xo
naturesmuse
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